Does Rest Feel Wrong?
Why does rest feel like something we have to earn?
Is guilt driving you to fill your schedule because everything feels urgent or important? Or maybe you’re feeling tired no matter how much sleep you get.
There is good news for you!
Be encouraged that true rest is available to you.
You can break up with guilt, shame, and condemnation! It’s time to live your life from a place of rest.
It’s within our design to desire acceptance, but as believers, our actions can sometimes become rooted in fear or guilt-driven obligation—especially when we operate from a place of lack, striving to achieve acceptance.
So, how do we recognize when we are doing things apart from the rest of God?
Here are a few indicators:
You struggle to relax without feeling guilty.
You tend to neglect your basic needs in favor of work or tasks.
You’re irritable. Small inconveniences set you off, or you are overly frustrated.
You can’t shake the fear of failure, inadequacy, or “not doing enough.”
You overcommit and take on more tasks or responsibilities than you can handle.
You are withdrawn from your friends and avoid meaningful interactions because your own emotional capacity is low.
You’ve become impatient with people and are short-tempered or overly critical when things don’t go your way.
You’re a “perfectionist” and you don’t like asking people for help or delegating tasks because you are afraid that others can’t do things “right” or as well as you can.
You override all of your physical and mental capacity. You say things like, “I just need to push through this,” or “I’ll rest once this is over.”
Can you relate to any of the above?
You can retrain yourself to think and do things from a foundation of love and rest instead of fear and striving.
In Matthew 11:28-30, Jesus says:
'Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”'
Rest is not a sign of weakness or laziness. It is a gift from God and His rhythm for flourishing!
Without rest, we’re essentially running on fumes, but with it, we unlock clarity, energy, and resilience.
A few years ago, I worked as a Director of Operations for a Real Estate team. I had always struggled with the lie that I wasn’t good enough, so I constantly tried to prove my worth to my boss by overworking myself. I often skipped my lunch breaks and went out of my way to please my team, but no matter what I did, it never felt like enough. Over time, I started making mistakes and clerical errors because I wasn’t resting.
The fear of getting things wrong or causing problems for the business began to weigh me down. I didn’t feel qualified for the situations I was being thrown into, and I couldn’t keep up. Still, I desperately wanted to gain my broker’s favor and prove to myself that I was capable and good enough. It felt good to be needed and seen as invaluable, but I was running on fumes and losing my peace of mind.
When I went home, my conversations with my family were consumed by work, and I couldn’t stop worrying about the messes I might face the next day. I was so afraid of making mistakes and being punished for them. Even when I got a full night’s sleep, I would wake up exhausted.
Has worry ever kept you from resting?
In Matthew 6:25-34, Jesus basically says “Do not worry.”
“For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is life not more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the sky, that they do not sow, nor reap, nor gather crops into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more important than they? And which of you by worrying can add a single day to his life’s span? And why are you worried about clothing? Notice how the lilies of the field grow; they do not labor nor do they spin thread for cloth, yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? You of little faith! Do not worry then, saying, ‘What are we to eat?’ or ‘What are we to drink?’ or ‘What are we to wear for clothing?’ For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be provided to you. “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.'
When we understand the Father's character and know that He is good based on who He is and not on who we are, we can then begin to rest!
Did you know that there are different types of rest?
Let’s look at seven types of rest:
Physical Rest - This is recovery for your body when you’re physically tired to renew your strength. Prioritize sleep, take naps if necessary, stretch, take walks, or get a massage!
Mental Rest - This is a break for your mind. If you’re feeling scattered or forgetful try a brain dump, setting boundaries on work, and being intentional with taking breaks.
Emotional Rest - Constantly managing your emotions can leave you feeling drained. Process with your trusted people, journal, or see a counselor. We have some great counselors on our team! Visit tcbethel.com/counseling to check it out.
Spiritual Rest - Life can be overwhelming. If you’re lacking purpose and vision or feel disconnected from the Lord, you need spiritual rest. Be intentional with your quiet time with Jesus. Worship, take prayer walks, and get into the Word. Allow His Presence to bring you rest and refreshment.
Social Rest - Not every relationship is life-giving to us in every season. Prioritize the people in your life who you can easily give to AND receive from.
Sensory Rest - We live in the technological age. Too much of it can leave us feeling frazzled and fried. Unplug from devices, have quiet time, and enjoy time outside.
Creative Rest - When we feel stuck in routine or uninspired, our imagination and creativity need to be re-engaged. Take time to reflect on the beauty of creation, listen to music and dance, or pull out your art supplies and create!
What kind of rest do you need?
Take a moment to pause and talk with the Holy Spirit.
God is inviting you to rest without a sense of guilt or shame.
It’s time to be free from the pressure to perform for love, casting it onto the shoulders of Jesus and receiving His gift of rest.
Below are some questions that you can ask God to help you get started:
“How do You want me to rest in this season of my life?”
“What changes can I make to ensure I’m prioritizing rest without feeling guilty?”
"Who or what is draining me emotionally, and how can I release those burdens to You?"
"How can I find rest in Your presence and trust You with my deepest feelings?"
“Are there relationships in my life that I need to reevaluate or set boundaries around?"
"How can I nurture connections that bring joy, peace, and restoration?"
Rest Begins With Trust—and Boundaries Help Keep It.
When you trust in God, rest becomes possible. But maintaining that rest requires boundaries that guard your time, energy, and focus. Dive deeper with our Boundaries Lab E-Course and learn how to create space for the rest God wants for you.
If you are distracted by all of the things that you need to get done and are having a hard time connecting with God, consider coming in for a Sozo .
